The Silent Negotiator

There has been a spate of negotiation books, over the past decade, which discuss the so-called Asian bargaining strategies.

It is more common that I encounter opponents who attempt to emulate the Asian model, which is to use silence as a weapon. The ploy is to make the other party feel uncomfortable, thus encouraging them to keep talking. It the adversary is taken off their script even briefly, the argument goes, the odds are they will become distracted or will divulge more information.

The shrewdest negotiators I know listen a lot and speak less. Their ability to ask questions is refined, and it keeps the other side talking. But they do not attempt a naked strategy of going silent. The best technique is to have carefully planned questions, but to ask them in a more relaxed and casual manner. This subtly keeps you in better control of the discussion dynamics.

In any negotiation there is a rich subtext, and to that attention must be paid.

Be wary of opponents who introduce tangential issues. They are using red herring techniques to distract and to tire you. Later they will often concede a largely irrelevant point they previously emphasized, to lend the appearance they […]